“My toddler daughter rode on my shoulders and touched my face during our last hike, grabbing random leaves as we went along…. I’m highly allergic to poison ivy.”

“I just realized that my toilet’s shut-off valve is basically just for appearances.”

“I’m having a disaster of a morning, and then this goddam squirrel stole the croissant I’d been saving to finally enjoy when I got back home.”

“I dropped my blackberry/chocolate cake.”

“I just spent over an hour in traffic on my way to work. Only then I looked down.”

“Cabinets collapsed in my kitchen.”

“My new sink arrived!”

“Made an apple pie for a “best pie” competition at work.”

“Gave my kids my old Toystory toys from when I was little, only to find them this morning like this.”

“My wife ate half my chocolate croissant but I didn’t know until I opened it up for lunch.”

“I dropped a (frozen solid) bag of ice on my toe.”

“My sister was putting on her make up in front of a window and the mirror she was using burnt s hole in her screen.”

“Got some takeout in a brown paper bag. Something was not packaged well and leaked out. Bottom of bag ripped open as I was pulling it out of the car.”

“Waited 2 hours just for the food to arrive dangerously undercooked.”

“Just bought a protective ring for my dartboard and barely missed.”

“Waited the entire summer to harvest potatoes and this is all my garden produced.”

“Potato person, I raise you my carrot.”

“You can’t leave them alone for one f**king minute.”

“The time I came out to of work to find my new car had been smashed into a tree and totalled.”

“After spending 3k on a new engine, my transmission exploded.”

“Saved up enough money to order a Nintendo Switch from Walmart+ and the box arrived empty.”

“I got this question wrong.”

“My friend breaking out of his own bathroom after his key broke in the lock. He is extremely claustrophobic and couldn’t wait for help.”

“There goes my meal for today and over half an hour of work.”